精選最新搞笑英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)3則
你叫什么名字? What's your name?

What's your name?
A very strict officer was talking to some new soldiers whom he had to train. He had never seen them before,so he began:My name is Stone, and I'm even harder than stone,so do what I tell you or there'll be trouble. Don't try any tricks with me, and then we'll get on well together
Then he went to each soldier one after another and asked him his name. Speak loudly so that everyone can hear you clearly, he said, and don't forget to call me 'sir'.
Each soldier told him his name, unitl he came to the last one. This man remained silent, and so Captain Stone shouted at him, When I ask you a question, answer it! I'll ask you again: What's you name, soldier?
The soldier was very unhappy, but at last he replied. My name is Stonebreaker, sir. He said nervously.
你叫什么名字?
有一位很?chē)绤柕能姽僭趯σ蝗航挥伤柧毜男卤栐?huà)。他以前從沒(méi)見(jiàn)過(guò)這群新兵,于是他開(kāi)始自我介紹:我的`名字叫Stone(石頭),事實(shí)上,我甚至比石頭更強硬。這就是我為什么要告訴你們我名字的原因。不要試圖對我玩什么花招,這樣我們就能很好相處了。
接著(zhù)他開(kāi)始走到每個(gè)士兵前面問(wèn)他們的名字。說(shuō)大聲點(diǎn),讓每個(gè)人都能聽(tīng)清楚。另外,不要忘記稱(chēng)呼我為長(cháng)官。他說(shuō)。
每個(gè)士兵都對他說(shuō)了自已的名字。他走到最后一位士兵面前時(shí),這個(gè)士兵保持著(zhù)沉默。于是Stone隊長(cháng)對他喊叫,當我問(wèn)你問(wèn)題的時(shí)候,要回答!我再問(wèn)一遍,你的名字,士兵?
那個(gè)新兵很不高興,但最后他回答了。我的名字是Stonebreaker(碎石機),長(cháng)官。他緊張的說(shuō)。
創(chuàng )造性 Creative
Creative
Applying for my first job, I realized I had to be creative in listing my few qualifications(資格證書(shū),職位要求) . Asked about additional schooling and training, I answered truthfully that I had spent three years in computer programming classes. I got the job.
I had neglected to mention that I took the same course for three years before I passed.
創(chuàng )造性
第一次求職時(shí),我意識到在列舉我所具備的為數不多的條件時(shí),得有點(diǎn)創(chuàng )造性。當問(wèn)及我是否受過(guò)其它的培訓時(shí),我老實(shí)地回答說(shuō)我花了三年時(shí)間學(xué)計算機程序設計課。我得到了那份工作。
我沒(méi)有提到那門(mén)功課我重復學(xué)了三年才考及格。
我可以干得慢一些 I Could Do It Slower
I Could Do It Slower
Patient: What do you charge for pulling a tooth?
Dentist: Fifty dollars.
Patient: Fifty dollars for a couple of minutes' work?
Dentist: Well, I could do it slower, if you like.
我可以干得慢一些
病人:拔一顆牙收費多少?
牙醫:50美元。
病人:只幾分鐘的活兒就要50美元?
牙醫:好的,如果你喜歡的話(huà),我可以干得慢一些。
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